wondering how to spend your weekend - here are a few tips from the eagle eye book of grand ideas ...

go to work - it's usually quiet there and you'll have the coffee machine all to yourself

go to the supermarket and walk as slowly and annoyingly round the aisles as you can, taking your time to browse the sweets section, just to annoy the bank holiday panic shoppers - just make sure you don't buy anything, though ... you need to save your money for ...

go to the outdoor shop and demand to see their winter range of fleeces, bob hats and anoraks - start a panic by warning customers you've heard there's a freak freeze on the way

give your house an artistic makeover - buy a few tins of paint of randomly gaudy colour and simply throw the contents at the outside walls of your house

get a new pressure washer that's the biggest in your street - your male neighbours will be SO intimidated

make yourself feel young again - play hopscotch, and knock and run (though not at the same time - you'll get caught)

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND...