if dogs are a mans best friend why do they never lend money?

if you were a world leader like barracks o'blimey, would you really want to meet gordon the brown? i'd say i was washing my hair that day and put him on a coach tour.

why can't they invent a tv remote control that finds programmes you actually want to watch?

isn't it time they mended all that breaking news?

why do boring football matches always go to extra time, and the good ones finish in 90 minutes?