i think doris has been on the cooking sherry again.
she's sacked the cleaner, kevin, and seems determined to do it herself.
i woke up this morning being swished by a feather duster.
she forced me to stand there while she ran a dishcloth over me.
i was so clean i was squeaking here and there.
and just as i was starting to enjoy it, she chucked me in the bath.

now she's cleaning the carpet - which involves her rolling it up under her arm, marching outside to hang it on the washing line (which snapped under the weight, naturally), then throwing it on the skip because it was dirtier than when she started.

by the sound of it, she is now cleaning out her knicker drawer, which should give me enough time to make that phone call to tell gordon brown he has been made redundant.  parliament isn't making enough money.  no-one wants to pay MPs to be on their boards of directors or write newspaper columns any more.  so something has to give.
poor gordon.
still - doris might need a hand ... and he's just the person to give her one...