doris is in a bad mood.
the pie factory has gone into receivership, despite her regular visits.
she's got a hangover after out drinking kev the chauffeur at the black pudding club last night.  apparently, she was on tequila with pint of guinness chasers.
she collapsed into bed, and the whole bed collapsed.  i ended up on top of her, and she belched and blew me toupee off. so i admonished her, if that's the right expression.  i don't think she knew much about it, to be honest...
and now she's discovered that my lady friends - scunthorpe hilton and sarah palin - are coming round tonight to talk to me about the possibility of them forming the next republican dream team.  doris muttered through her pan of scrambled eggs that if they wanted a dream team, they should pick accrington stanley.

hope you're having a nice day?!