did i mention that doris is having a girls night tonight.
she's hosting one of those ann summers parties.

she's asked me if i'd be a model.
i said no way.
i'd look stupid in a flimsy bra.  i need a bit more support than that.

no, she said.
men's underwear.
thongs.

ok, i said. on one condition.
you pay for my bikini wax.

i knew that would work. the offer was withdrawn.
she's so tight she's got cobwebs on her purse.

she's now pestering kev the chauffeur who is doing his best to try on a thong that looks like it last did service as a fan belt on a skoda.

i think i'll watch tv tonight.
i believe sumo wrestling is on.