doris was shaving her beard this morning - with my lawnmower and a tub of chip fat.
she got quite a smooth finish, and finished the job off by trimming her nasal hair with the garden shears.
then she lumbered into the shower - a makeshift affair admittedly:  a converted garden shed...kev operates a foot pump which powers the water up through the hose pipe and down onto doris through a bucket with a few holes punched in the bottom.
then doris usually demands i give her one of my famous massages, which involves me hiking across her wide open plains with me boots on, before thrashing her with my ceremonial stick.

by this time, she looks a picture.
by salvador dali.
and she is ready for anything, zinging with energy and appetite.

unfortunately, kev and i are ready for a lie down.

but that's another story.