i have stretched my tentacles a bit lately (but don't worry, i am taking tablets and i can still have children).

i have observed, among many other things, that more rolex oyster watches have been reported stolen on the costa del sol than have ever been manufactured.

i can exclusively reveal that cuba will lift its ban on electric toasters in two years time.

and norway, denmark and iceland have all made it illegal to drink red bull.

it's a crazy world out there.
it all goes to show there's really only one place to live on the entire planet, if not the universe, or beyond - the isle of kevin, of course.

i don't put up with any of this nonsense, as you know. 

if you want to propose a toast to a red bull wearing a rolex, that's entirely up to you.

it's a free country, innit?