@ 2008-07-23 – 19:41:29
i've picked out three of my recent bird pictures to share with you over the next day or two.
i love them for different reasons.
this gull had a really enigmatic mona lisa expression.
it stayed so still, watching me closely.
i'm sure if i'd had a mirror, it would have asked to borrow it.
if i was a gull, i'd probably marry her.
>> you may have to double click to see it full size.
@ 2008-07-23 – 12:19:50
did you know that food companies are still pushing their unhealthy food to children by cunning methods including social networking sites, text messaging competitions and viral message promotions - even though 88 per cent of consumers think they should be more responsible.
some companies have introduced policies to stop marketing to children under 12 - yet even they carry on targeting youngsters through traditional techniques like cartoon characters, film tie-ins, celebrity endorsements and fun freebies.
Kelloggs encourages kids to text to receive a free ringtone as part of their zookeeper competition on high sugar cereals. Coca Cola introduced a Fanta branded mobile phone game, sent to all entrants of the ‘Want it, Win it’ competition.
food companies use popular websites such as BEBO, Facebook, You Tube and ClubdTV to reach children in their masses. Cadbury websites included links to child-focused games and competitions, and Mars and Pepsico developed more sophisticated ‘cool’ brand sites, often linking promotions with popular social networking sites.
there's no doubt it is effective marketing - after all, nearly 49 per cent of children ages 8-17 have a profile on a social networking site.
but the killer is that, if current trends continue, it is predicted that 70 per cent of girls and 55 per cent of boys will be overweight or obese by 2050.
so come to the isle of kevin, and watch in awe as all our little kevins eat carrot and go jogging and help old people across the road - i wish!
@ 2008-07-23 – 10:51:50
it was a beautiful morning and i could hear a lark in the meadows, though it was interrupted when the police were called.
doris was wearing a wide brimmed hat - so wide, in fact, that she needed three people to hold onto the edges so she could see beyond her size fifteens.
she had teamed this with a low cut vest, though why she wanted to show off her belly button as well was beyond me.
to be honest, i think she must have tucked it into her leather shorts too fiercely.
but it worked.
she got all the attention and the wolf whistles as we strolled to a sun kissed beach together.
the sight of doris's top proved too much for one old bloke, who immediately lost his sense of direction and chased the stick he'd just thrown for his dog.
into the sea.
the dog rolled on its back laughing.
doris leaned over to tickle its stomach and discovered something about the laws of gravity.
she fell face first onto the sand.
luckily, kev's construction company was on hand, and with the aid of a specially adapted bulldozer, we were able to get her upright again.
i'm now trying to get the sand out with the aid of a lavatory brush, and a dyson.
life is just one big adventure.
hope you have a more relaxing day...
@ 2008-07-22 – 23:57:01
i automatically think of 'the last supper'.
and wonder what i would choose to eat if this really was my last supper.
these are important thoughts, but i am willing to share them with the world.
scrambled egg and smoked salmon, is a possibility.
scallops and black pudding ... maybe.
but, knowing my luck, it would be the sort of buffet you get at conferences...
stupid little pastry parcels full of flavoured goo, and chicken legs (when did you ever see a chicken leg looking like that?), and grated cheese sandwiches constructed to collapse the minute you lift one off the platter.
and for you?
@ 2008-07-22 – 20:03:07
is pasta.
and apple pie and cream.
i just had to have apple pie and cream tonight.
it was an urge.
daft, really.
do you get urges like that?
@ 2008-07-22 – 14:37:05
a sushi snack pack for a quid, and a ham and egg roll for two quid.
i only wish now i'd bought a big slab of cake, if only to avoid feeling virtuous.
but there'll be time to eat unhealthily later.
i've had a call from the kitchen staff to say that doris has taken over the kitchens and there's a strong aroma of cow.
@ 2008-07-21 – 22:46:37
it's environment friendly.
runs on electricity.
no car tax.
two pence a mile running costs.
i don't know about you, but i'd rather walk.
@ 2008-07-21 – 22:30:07
we occasionally share - usually when i've had my iron tablets.
but tonight, doris wants her beauty sleep.
i ventured to suggest that she might want to take two weeks over it but she advised me with the aid of a right hook that one night would be enough to restore her good looks.
so she's sleeping alone, in her own bed.
it's a water bed.
well, it's a swimming pool with a thirty by fifteen metre lilo wedged on the top.
kev the chauffeur has volunteered to make waves tonight, so he's strapping on his breathing apparatus - a pork pie hat with a drainpipe attachment.
i warned him to be very careful where he comes up for air because doris moves around a lot at night. i didn't like the smirk on his face when i said that.
i'll be interested to see his wave making machinery, and i didn't like the smirk on his face when i said that, either.
oh well, leave them to it.
anyway, at least, i'll get some slumber tonight.
and i won't wake up with a jerk.
@ 2008-07-21 – 18:11:44
how's this for a traffic queue, which i encountered on my way home tonight.
think wacky races ...
and in the lead and setting a stunning pace of 15 miles per hour we have ned the farmer in his vintage tractor with square wheels, carrying a full load of manure;
but close behind is brenda, at the wheel of her empty double decker bus and taking time out to nonchalantly chomp at a mars bar;
in third place, and determined to stay there forever, is fred, wearing his sporty trilby and driving gloves and pushing that rover hatchback to its very limits;
and so on, and so on ... a snaking queue of at least fifteen cars, none of the drivers prepared to overtake anyone else.
it was easy for me, though - i was on my trusty motorbike, thank goodness!
(checks watch)
now let me see - i wonder if any of them have made it home yet?
@ 2008-07-20 – 22:58:12
chance'd be a fine thing.
there's a big buzzy fly in the house and i know it's going to find it's way upstairs, waiting to go zzzzzzzz while i'm trying to go zzzzzzzz.
hope you have better luck.
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